Two And A Half.

Being a single mom with two kids, working a full time job, and attempting to go to school so my kids can have a better life is stressful alone. That's for any single parent, but in my case even more so. I am dealing with the fact that my daughter has a genetic disorder.Their father is around, but doesn't help much. Which is why I left him. My kids deserve better! My whole life is work, and my kids. If it wasn't for seeing the smiles on my kids faces I would probably break down everyday. At night its the hardest for me. I get the kids ready for bed alone, I tuck them in alone. Sometimes I wish their dad was here helping, but when I look at them I know I can do this without him. I work at least 30 hrs a week ,mainly nights, so I'm exhausted from working. When I get that pay check, and I can go out and buy them whatever they want or need feels great. I have a two year old son, who I love and spoil like crazy! He's my baby boy, and he knows when his mommy is sad. He will come up to me, and say "momma are you ok?" That right there makes all the craziness in my world disappear.

I also have 6 month old daughter, who has genetic disorder called Trisomy 18. Ohh how I hate Trisomy 18! Trisomy 18 is when you have an extra chromosome attached where you were only suppose to have one. Most woman actually miscarry. The doctors told me after two weeks my angel was born my body was strong enough to hold on to her. I am so thankful it did. My family and I found out that Trisomy 18 is terminal, so eventually my daughter will be up in heaven watching over me and her brother. It will very slowly take over her whole body, and break it down. But I try to not let that get in the way. I try to think that everything is ok. Every second I get with her I cherish, I take tons of pictures with her and try to take her to see the world. I break down when I'm alone; it's hard knowing that I'm going to lose my daughter. However I know I can not give up; because I have to stay strong for my son. He needs his mommy too. So while I'm at work thinking if my daughter is ok it's also my escape! Being a single mom is harder than I thought, and also very lonely! But I have great kids, a family, and great friends who keep me on my toes. I love them for that very much!

Nicole Brennan

Dedicated to Aubrey Renae Harvey